US GRANT’S Ringing Ears

                                                             

An Episode Of  Ringing In My Ears                                                                                                                                                            

       After a time of more or less two weeks, I came down with a furious infuriating ringing in my ears. Precious took me to see Dr. Friden at the Intermountain Health Care. Dr. Friden said, 

 I had tinnitus. which could be caused by tension, emotional or physical.Tension management involves controlling and reducing the tension that occurs in stressful situations.  My desire to make changes will pretty much determine how much change takes place. The tension center is located in my xylem a physical blue lining as is seen on a Cat-scan. Different people consider different situations to be tense. He also said, emotional tension usually occurs in situations involving humans. Physical tension refers to a physical reaction to various triggers, as for example the pain experienced after surgery. Physical tension often leads to emotional tension, and emotional tension often occurs as physical tension, an example would be stomach cramps. Hearing loss is taking its toll not just on you but on everyone’s ears. It’s incredibly common among ageing squash. About 37 billion squash in America have some degree of hearing loss and with 100,000 squash turning 65 each day, its expected to shoot up. Public Health Official’s estimate that 25% to 40% of male squash over 6o have some hearing loss and 63%of those over 70 had mild to severe impairment.  

        Hearing loss is more common in males possibly because men are more likely to work in noisy environment such as construction. Incredibly, only about 20% seek help. Cost is a factor hearing aids can run $1,600 to $3,000 each or more as well as the stigma of wearing them. Many are living with a hearing loss for a decade or more without seeking medical help. However, that was not the case for a patient by the name of G.H.C. Butch, a large melon squash. While lifting weights; he suddenly lost hearing in his left ear. During the subsequent examination, he also was found to have had some age related hearing loss in his right ear. He was given hearing aids for both ears. He shrugged off any suggestion of a stigma; comparing them to eye glasses. No one likes the idea of a device siting on their nose or poking out of their ear, but on the other hand they are extremely effective. When it comes to hearing there’s not much G.H.C. Butch said he miss’s out on. 

     Genetics, smoking, diet and drugs, tumors, aging processes called prebycusis and health conditions such as caused by to much heavy C02 and root nodule disease can affect hearing as well. Insults to the ear such as  as repetitive-loud exposure over time, such as shooting guns at crows. Tinnitus (pronounced tin-EYE-tus). Tinnitus is an ear disease that causes a high-pitched ringing, roaring, sound. It can be high or low,single or multi-toned, or a mild annoyance or a constant din.

       First of all, Dr. Fried tried psychology on me to see if it would help my tinnitus. For thirty minutes he had me meditate while looking at nude pictures in “Play Boy Fruit and Vegetables,” magazine, but that didn’t to help. The ringing sound continued, so he reappointed me for a Cambrian Juice Test to be taken in six weeks, at the same time his nurse made an appointment for me to see Dr. Valery Sweetpea, an audiologist with a round face who worked at Weber University Health Systems. Dr. Sweetpea, after a costly examination sent me home with a tuning out gadget that had ear phones that look like a MP3 player designed to help fruits and especially squash. The device plays baroque and new-age music customized to provide auditory stimulation in patients with lost frequencies. It plays a garden hose shower sound for night time sleeping. I was ordered to listen to the program for two hours daily for two months, and then the tuning out gadget is withdrawn for four more months, which gradually trains the brain to filter out noise. Dr. Sweetpea stated, in an erudite tone according to a new study by a nonprofit educational advocacy group of seagulls, some six million squash find it so disturbing that it interferes with sleep, work,  concentration and sexual relationships. The incidence is rising along with the aging population and personal music players being cranked up high. 3 month old squash are complaining this had never to have been before heard of. Tinnitus is also the number one insomnia related disability among crows in Utah due to brain injuries mainly from falling walnuts and horse chestnuts.

        Let’s backtrack for a moment to my story: Then a very strange thing happened over the holidays., I was using the tuning out gadget daily, while listening to an album of Santa Claus Christmas Songs. I started to covet Christmas songs with holiday mixes; I listened all my waking hours to anything Christmassy. I especially liked music with sleigh bells in it.  I pulled a CD from my jam-packed CD case, a song sung by four male sparrows and their jingle bell band. In the song a banana squash is upset because the prostitutes in his favorite bar are old, with old dried up pumpkin like wrinkled faces. Give the younger dressed up ornate adorned sexy women a chance. Bar hangouts covet holiday mixes. People will listen to anything if you put sleigh bells in it, with a Black Idaho bear with its rumbling basso buffo voice tuned to match. E.Gorodetsky the Bear is 54 a celebrity a star in pop culture universes. Today he’s on a treasure hunt searching a half acre of recorded music for gold at Amoeba Records in Hollypumkinwood. It’s a 1940 track by Calypso king the Might Sparrow. What a crazy concept for a song! As a TV Mr. G has seven Emmy nominations and one win. He has written for “SCTV,” "Saturday Night Live,” "David Letterman," "Two And A Half Men,”  Big Bang Theory, plus “Mike and Molly” a new project a crazy quilt mix of genre-and-decade-jumping wings. He has a record collection containing a vast array of Christmas music. He made these holiday songs mixes and sent them to friends for years. 

       I can’t carry a tune, but I love music and I love sharing it. For people who are beyond obsessed about music, like the need to share it almost like an emergency medical assist. It’s your duty to turn the other person on. The mix of my tapes and CD’; s were intended to do spread holiday cheer, I rail against the of forms of music that sprang from whore hoses and gambling joints and back alleys. I like artists like Howling Wolf and the Jamborees. I can listen to Lester Young and it breaks my heart. The idea with the mist rapes was to get people to listen to stuff they wouldn’t normally listen, a reggae track here then a country track followed by a jump blues tune. People will listen to anything if you put sleigh bells on it. I mean what a loopy crazy song! And the price of Christmas songs this year! CD’s for one jaw bone on up to a jaw and a half territory, simply jumped up from regular price somehow.

         Knowing isn’t  everything, self-awareness doesn’t bail you out. Yes crows have successfully made me feel as I do or did, but that doesn’t lead me anywhere interesting. We’ve been there, done that, all of us. The feeling is as if we’ve lost momentum and are falling into the nothing at our circle’s center, caught in motion for its own sake. These syntactic fireworks need to terminate in an emotional or intellectual experience for the sufferer. If this sounds romantic or transcendent, it is not, or at least mostly not. When the subject is the self and the self alone, it’s easy to get caught in recursive loops, and those sections of nothing are  frustrating in the way that night time dreams often are self- involved, inward-seeming, and unmoored from the real world. Can you believe it? If this all sounds ridiculous, about the same time, what had been hoped for happened, a prescription from the right pharmacy. Precious washed the ear lump starch out of my ears with the same garden hose I had been listening to for sleeping. My water bill went down, I sleep like a log, plus I haven’t had any ringing since, and hearing is better that it has ever

been.

To be continued…                                                                           

DR. KARL WALLACE D.D.S.

To read more of my writings please go to:         w.w.w.karlwallceblog.spotblog.com