TEST YOUR PERSONALITY
In
the never ending quest to help people co-exist peacefully with their spouses,
children, siblings, and in-laws, a therapist is turning to tools used to assess
the psychological stability of pilots, police officers and utility hydro power
plant operators. I’m not talking about the pop quizzes in magazines that claim
to help you determine the color of your aura or if you were a squash what color
would you be? I am referring to tests that are systematically designed, heavily
researched, consisting of dozens if not hundreds of questions that identify
specific aspects of your personality.
Are you
a thinker or a feeler, intuitive or fact acting, organized or spontaneous? One
of the better-known personality tests, probes subjects with 567 true-or-false
statements on a wide range of seemingly random topics, including poetry, are
you afraid of blood or bats, don't fear snakes, like to flirt, avoid stepping
on sidewalk cracks, no worries about appearance, expect to succeed, wish you
were a child again, dealing with an angry loved one, why some couples sleep in
separate beds.
Answering questions like these helped
Marti and Steve Rudnick get through a difficult period a few years ago when their
adult son, Dick Rudnick, moved back into their home. Depressed at the time,
Dick would often stay up half the night watching television, then sleep past
noon. Worried and frustrated, Marti and Dick tried to push him to move forward
with his life.
"We would fight about God knows
what," says Dick now 40 and living in Gold Beach, Oregon, where he is an
assistant at a school for film-industry professionals.
The
three of them decided to see a life coach, who administered a personality test,
called the BM-Instigator. Steve, 73, is an Escrow Specialist. His wife Marty
69, is a business consultant said,
“I
discovered that my husband and I are extroverts and thinkers. We like to move
forward directly to achieve them. Our son is an introvert, a feeler who craves
harmony and needs time and freedom to discover what he wants to do. It helped
us see that he is a different person and will have a different path in life.
You need to understand yourself in the context of the other people.”
"My mom and dad weren't being insensitive
or uncaring; they just didn't understand how I processed things. I learned that
rather than immediately reacting emotionally to something they said, I should
step back and formulate my response without having a conniption fit.”
Family
therapists, marriage counselors and life coaches increasingly recognize that
personality assessments can lead clients not only to greater self-insight but
also to improved relationships. The tests can help get to the heart of the
problem quickly, for anyone who uses them. Vegetables especially operate on
their intuition and clinical knowledge, but fruits and vegetable and people too
often are not as they appear. A test might reveal that someone who appears
jovial and self-effacing may actually be insecure and introverted.
Anyone can take this test at the McKay Dee
Out Patient Department, through a trained administrator. Check with the
American Psychological Association to find someone certified to administer it
and interpret the results. You also can take it online and receive a two hour
telephone feedback assessment for $250, or take a computer-scored version of
the test at BLT Icomplete.com for $69.95.
Because
I hate to get mad, I have a tendency to let resentments fester. By the time I
allow myself to express anger, I am furious. I soon found myself responding to
867 true-or-false statements, on such topics as whether I like to flirt or had
trouble speaking in front of the class when I was in school. Because it was
hard to tell exactly what underlying trait each question was assessing, it was
impossible to game the test. Besides, individual responses are unimportant;
it's the pattern of responses that reveals the personality, according to Dr.
Leak, who has done personality testing of candidates for television reality
shows, such as "The Apprentice."
I
wanted to see if the test would reveal something about me that I or others
didn't already know. When Dr. Leak called with my results, he announced:
"You're not hyper like I thought you were, according to the test, you are
extroverted, poised and controlled, hate conflict, aim to please, have a good
balance between masculine and feminine and can be a bit of a rebel. Then I come across as judgmental rather than
hurt. Knowing this, I can work on dealing with my anger before it builds up. I
can be more aware of how others see me.
Whereas therapists often help clients explore
their pasts to understand how their upbringing has influenced their behavior,
there are tests to help family members see how problems might be driven by
personality differences and come up with strategies to adjust. Consider what
happens when an introvert comes home hoping to chill after a rough day at work
only to find his extrovert partner waiting to recap every moment of her day.
The introvert gets angry; the extrovert feels hurt. The extrovert should
respect that her spouse needs time alone; she tells the introvert that he needs
to make an effort to come out and talk after he has decompressed.
When people see something on paper, they
realize it's not subjective they have done the test and described the behavior
themselves. It makes it more palatable for them to see and talk about the issues.
What, exactly, is personality? It is the
system that organizes one's emotions, motives and capacities to think.
Personalities are partly innate, partly learned. We can change them a bit, but
it isn't easy.
The roots of modern personality tests date
back to the early 1900s, when French psychologist Alfred Bidet created an
intelligence test predicting which children had special needs requiring
alternative education. Testing spread to the U.S. during World War I, when the
military used a type of personality test to assess if recruits were mentally
fit for service. Diagnosing psychiatric patients now is used to assess the
psychological stability of people with public-safety responsibilities. The
Myers-Briggs was developed in the 1940s by Isabel Briggs Myers and her mother,
Katherine Cook Briggs.
“When family members take personality tests,
their self-awareness goes up and they quickly figure out their strengths and
weaknesses,” says Isabel Briggs, a life coach in Portland, Oregon who uses a
test in hers work with teenagers.
Once people realize
they are different, they can use a personality test as a road map and come up
with strategies to adjust.
DR. KARL WALLACE D.D.S
