Saturday, March 3, 2012

LEW THORPE’S CAR BODY

KARL WALLACE


Lew Thorp lives on the east bench in South Ogden. His home is only accessible by a remote controlled electronic gate; he lives there with his lovely wife, just now can’t remember her name. He has a full-time gardener, and a house painter, along with several cleaning ladies. At times, he has made lots of money.


Lew Thorp, "Mr. Super Duper,” has the largest automotive parts and paint sales company in Utah, at least for the moment. Many people doubt if he will be able to retain his sales leadership this year.



Hugh Downs, is Lew’s sidekick at the-five- day- a week coffee meetings, can be called upon at any minute by Lew for consultation, even when Bill Arnold is talking. The two of them like to share adventurous stories about their humble beginnings. Life at the McDonald’s coffee place is normally blab, blab…about the speed of a Dewey Drone with its gears in neutral. This week, however, there was suddenly an uncomfortable change. Word had filtered out through one of Lew’s cleaning ladies that Lew, who had been in the past an expert of the automotive parts sales world, had been underperforming a tad in the number of parts and paint sales for the first two quarters of this year.



Lew the owner of “Ogden Auto Parts,” was cooking dinner at the entry way of his court yard. Unlike one’s everyday kitchen, he was throwing pans and food around as if they were going out of style then he from one of the cleaning ladies first heard about the sales slump at his business.



”Is it true; is there a leak in the dam?" Have the numbers gone down river?” Lew pondered, “I didn’t win twenty consecutive Blue Ribbon Automotive Gold Awards and free Hawaii trips for my employees watching TV, drinking beer, and eating popcorn.” “It took me over seven long years of hard work before topping Larry Miller in sales.to become Utah’s top auto paint sale's. And in 2012 is still my goal!”


No matter, it's become trendy to be a “Lew doubter,” considering his age, recent by-pass surgery with last month having a stent in his carotid artery. And there is more.


Utah Auto Association secretary, Kay Arnold, recently noted the other day that he's a unnewly-like one in twenty one odds to win the Utah Auto Assoc. Sales Award this year. More recently, a poll was taken in which only one expert picked Lew to be a loser in the Kings Personality Parts Sales Spa Bunch contest. Add in automotive analyst, Lil' Wayne Morris, who totally blew off Lew's chances for this year’s Playboy Magazine, “Auto-mate Man-Of- the- Year Award,” It’s quite conclusive: Now is the time for Lew to step down alongside Sara Palin.


Amid this cloud of underestimation, Lew surfaced Monday morning in the Ogden City McDonald’s (39th and Washington Blvd.) He looked, as always, Lew-tastic. He wore an understated navy blue ensemble that contrasted elegantly against the new Lesbian New Yorker's open look.


McDonald’s is a rehab center for the many Monday through Friday Lew coffee fans. They come and go between the time of the first sip of coffee starting at 8 am and the last sip at 11:30 am.


One incident at Monday's coffee meeting was very noticeable indeed. It was a Lew between-the-legs, middle finger, which flabbergasted all the customers and the McDonald's cleaning lady, too. The finger thing is a stirring reminder of the taken-for-granted great salesmanship that still lurks within the eighty year old one time, many years ago, South Ogden JC President. Mid-way between the same coffee meeting, Lew nimbly jumped upon a table and calmly stated, "I'm going to win the sales parts contest this year! There is none as good as my company!"


Bill Arnold, the number-one seeded coffee talker seconded the motion by the cleaning lady that

“Lew is the greatest, he is the automotive people’s choice.”


It’s Lew’s curse to have had a top notch successful business for so long. Now it is no longer helpful having whisperings compliments from cleaning ladies and Bill Arnold. Can you once again change the tide Lew? The doubters are multiplying.

Lew along with his lovely wife, flew his plane out of town, a little discouraged this weekend. His falconer, Zerxes stayed behind guarding the entry gate in Ogden to acting as an extra watch dog. You can’t make this stuff up. His plan is a one month boat ride down the Blue Danube into the Black Sea. Will there be enough time to plan a comeback? Will he be back as a hero teacher of his Sunday school class or be disqualified from the Mormon Tabernacle Choir for eternity?


"Can you, once again, chage the tide," Lew? The doubters are multiplying.

To read more Karl Wallace stories: Karlwallaceblog.blogspot.com

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