AUTHOR KARL WALLACE
US Grant is an animated vegetable who is a star at Who BYU video where he sits on a kitchen counter and taunts whatever vegetable, fruit, or unlucky edible that gets set down near him. He heckles the other guy with question and cracks lame jokes. He cackles at them in his shrill voice until the fun ends, tragically, when a human hand slices his new friend with a butcher knife right before one’s eyes, then he is eaten by the cook. Children love it, the food Channel Comcast 402 gets a high Neilson rating, and US earns a living.
This story, however, is about Grant’s life at his home. He lives at Hill Air Force Base in Roy, Utah 84406, Hanger 210 in a faraway back room. General Grant is kind to the museum gift shop’s part time cashier Pat (Patsy) Curtis, as well as friends, and his wife Passion, who was dressed in a conservative black skirt and jacket with white trim last Sunday in church. Nobody lays a knife on her, and she keeps his hear flutter. US Grant is a native squash, is retired, loves airplanes. The fact is that the hanger doors, plus the side doors of the museum, are closed at 5 p.m.; then he can start having fun after the visitors and the employees leave.
The building itself is loaded with World War I and II vintage planes that date all the way back to Kitty Hawk, the Wright Bros., and beyond. It is home for the most famous Air Force fighter plane of World War II, the American P51 Mustang.
US Grant would be a good marketing match for the customer Advertiser as he can communicate well with humans anywhere in the world.US
communicates well with black birds also. He doesn’t’ like dogs—hates dogs— but he enjoys talking with cats He is an intelligent elderly Squash, is simple hearted, and can accurately communicate made by beasts and birds. According
to Mr. Grant, "Some animals have a limited education and so have a limited
vocaulary, whereas other animals have a large vocabulary and a fine command
of language, and are fluent with delivery. After long and careful observations, I
came to the conclusion that crows are the best talker. You never see a crow get
stuck for a word, they just come boiling out of himm and with good grammar,
too. A crow is just the same as any squash and smart any squash except he has
black and doesn't go to church.
Crows are birds of a different teather and I'll tell you why. A crow's interests, feelings, and instincts cove all the ground. A Crow hasn't any more principle than a Congreeman. He will lie, steal, deceive, and betray--nine times out of ten a crow will go back on his solemn promises, cross-your heart, stick-a-needle-in-you-eye. On top of this, a crow can out-swear any oil well digger in the Yukon. Yer sir, a crow can cry, laugh, reason, plan, and discuss just as well as you or I. A crow likes gossip and scandal as well. I'll tell you of an incident that proves crows are on an equal level with squash and how smart crows really are.
To be continued tomorrow. To read more Karl Wallace stories: Go To KARLWALLACEBLOG.BLOGSPOT.COM
To be continued tomorrow. To read more Karl Wallace stories: Go To KARLWALLACEBLOG.BLOGSPOT.COM
otheranimals
