ODE TO MY LITTLE SISTER

1-31-14                       ODE TO MY LITTLE SISTER

I look around and feel this world close in on me, no one could be as miserable                                                                                                                                                                                                             The world is real but I all alone remain insane, insane,                            Trying my best to be normal but instead,                                                        Schizophrenia haunts me night and day.                                                                                                                                                                                                                

Why my psychologist doesn’t help me to live separated from delusions,                          I don’t know I with my husband and two small boys who would have a normal family life except for me, Happiness resides with friends where fun dwells and the air swells with laughter, And continues on up to resonate the church bell towers across the street on to heaven.

                                                                                                                                                                                           I breathe damp stale air in the bedroom, look around and see the grey world,                            Ugly objects standing steadily unconcerned uncaring giving me extremely scary looks.              The days pass on, on and on, and my delusions in our home on Denver street are there                The long no forgotten misery has turned out only sad memories for me.

Now just a way of life, I’m on the l nervous  break  down road                                                        That winds , twines and intertwines through the dark day and night                                                Someday, I pray,  I will get well, leave my room and  home,                                                         With the messy bed, tattered  books, dirty clothes  strung about.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

Pathetically waiting, yet unconcerned if I should try to                                                               Arrange then more appropriately where they would look                                                           More pleasing to the eye. Impossible! This room will never                                                               Be anything but misery to anyone who might enter with a

Reproachful eye and try to change it before I die.                                                                               Scrubbing on the walls scrubbing on the floors,                                                                             And only show the mars and mess that still exist                                                                                 Because of my hyper-bipolarize and hypo bipolarize.

  

Fix the table, erase the writing on the wall, but alas                                                                                                                                                                                 Arrangement cannot exist where mess persists.                                                                                  I finally sit contented and happy                                                                                                         That I like no one else must stay,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         

I cannot leave the room before fall because today                                                                            I’m finally free you see                                                                                                                           I ‘m taking a cab to the capital to finally                                                                                         Pass up it all to my deity.     

My life in heaven...   To be continued  

                                                                                                                                                            

DR. KARL WALLACE D.D.S.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        

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